Long Distance Love: How to Stay Connected to Your Mom in College

Our mothers spend 18 years of their lives caring for us in their presence, and then they have to learn to care for us several miles away. It’s our job to make that a little easier for them. Our love for our mothers doesn’t shrink when we move away, it just looks a little different. Even if you can’t go home until each class has started and finished for the semester, connection is still possible. 

Connection with our mothers looks different in this new season of our lives. We are actively growing into new versions of ourselves that they may not know yet. It’s hard to find the time to call her for hours a day and catch up on every little word that’s been added to your story. Don’t feel guilty when you can’t always carve that out of your schedule. 

Talking to our mothers is arguably one of the biggest ways we can practice wellness. It’s important that as college students we feel seen, supported, and grounded. If no one else is there for you, you can be sure your mother is. Staying connected isn’t just for her; it’s for you, too. 

It doesn’t have to be a burden to talk to your mom. Here’s a few ways I like to connect with my mother from several miles away. 

• Walk & Talk

  • Anytime I’m walking home late from campus, I always give my mom a call. It can be the shortest conversation from one place to another, but it shows her that you are thinking of her and want to stay in the loop of her life back home. 

• Sending the Small Moments

  • It could be the smallest win or the most minor inconvenience, but I guarantee my mom will know about it. Sending the small, or big, wins to my mom reinforces the support she has for me. And when it's an inconvenience, she always knows what to say to make it just a little bit better. 

• Cooking Through the Phone

  • Not only is it a great way to get a balanced meal, mom always knows best in the kitchen (and everywhere else). When I am cooking a new recipe, or even one I’ve made a thousand times, I facetime my mom so she can join me. I know she loves to watch me learn new recipes, so it’s one of my ways to show her I care. 

• Schedule your Check-Ins

  • This seems a little transactional for a mother-daughter relationship, and I don’t particularly “schedule” my chats with my mom, but if your schedule is so overwhelming that staying connected with your mom has no place, schedule out your conversations. Save a spot on your calendar where you can put everything else aside and just talk to your mom. Not only does it reinforce that connection, it gives you a chance to take your mind off of everything else going on.  

My mom has been my rock for the entirety of my life, and I couldn’t imagine going a day without talking to her. I asked her what staying connected with her daughter meant to her:

“I want to know she’s safe, taking care of herself, and getting enough rest. I need to be reassured her mental health is good, and I need her to know I love her,” she said. “She is my heart, so I need to talk to her regularly, even if it’s just to hear her voice for 30 seconds.”

Remember that every time you take care of yourself, you are honoring the ones who taught you how. Make your connection with your mom a part of your wellness routine. Allow your mom to join you on this crazy journey called life. I promise she’s happily along for the ride. 

Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms out there!

Be Well, Auburn.